Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
