But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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