Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Found the puke drawer
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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