Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
