nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
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