i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Green mimosas i think yes
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
