Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
