She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
