Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
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