I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Randomize
