the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
BRING THE BAGELS
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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