I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
