Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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