I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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