I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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