Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
