it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
