i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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