i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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