Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
