Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize
