Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
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