nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
