office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
false alarm, still single
Randomize
