Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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