Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize