Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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