Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
and i looked up. we had an audience...
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
