So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I wish you could order shots online.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
