My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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