She said her name was "party"
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
