it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
