maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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