This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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