is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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