I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
