i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize
