when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
