my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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