the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
