Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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