my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
