Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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