omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
