I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
