Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
