Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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