Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i just wanna soil my oats bro
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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