i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Farmville is her only friend.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
The convent might be a nice break from real life
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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