I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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